Sibling Rivalry – How To Help Siblings Adjust To New Baby

Bringing a new baby home can be rough on everyone, but especially on older siblings. Learn how you can help older siblings adjust to a new baby.

If you’ve been following me for a while on the blog, or keeping up with me over on Instagram, you know that we’re expecting baby #2 soon! 

While I’m so grateful that our family will be growing, I’ve also been pretty nervous about how I’m going to adjust to having a newborn and a toddler.

Thankfully, my Facebook group is full of some amazing mama’s who are full of great advice.

Today you’ll be hearing from one of those amazing mamas, Jaleysa from Girl Talk Inc., about how you can prevent sibling rivalry by learning how to make older siblings feel included with a new baby! 

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Most of us have probably thought about the time when you would have children.

You’ve thought about how many you wanted to have, if you wanted boys or girls, and even what you would name them.

It was a fairy tale in your head…

Then, BOOM!

You have your first baby!

You’re elated, exhausted, and overwhelmed all at the same time.

Being a first-time mom is a beautiful experience and there’s honestly nothing like it.

Nothing prepares you for what you will face as a mother, but you welcome it with love.

But, what happens when you have made the decision to have multiple children?

How will the older sibling react?

Will you be able to manage more than one child?

If you’re unsure of this or just need a little help, here are a few tips on how to make sure you’re older children don’t feel left out when your new bundle of joy arrives.

Start The Conversation Early

By this, I mean throughout your pregnancy be sure to include your little one in things that involve the baby. Talk to them about what’s going to happen. Buy a few books about babies and read to them so they understand what’s happening. You can even show them your belly and let them feel the baby kick. Ask them how they feel and make sure they know that even though there’s a new baby coming, they are still loved just as much. If kids have an understanding of what’s going on, they will be more receptive when the baby arrives.

Make Them Feel Included

This can actually be fun! Let the older sibling help pick out baby clothes that they would like for the baby. Let them help decorate the nursery or even attend a few doctors appointments with you. My kids are 11, 9, 6, 4 & 1. When I had my youngest baby, I made sure that my 4-year-old was included in everything I did. 

I talked to her about the baby, what the baby was and the doctors even let her participate in the exams so she felt like a big sister. She helped pick out clothes and decorations for the baby shower, and she was so excited. When I went into labor, all my kids were in the room with me when Jaxson was born. My 4-year-old followed the doctors everywhere with her new baby brother and made sure that they knew she was his big sister.

Let Them Help Out At Home

Kids are more accepting of things if they feel like they have a role or a job to do.  It gives them a sense of pride and they will enjoy telling people what they did. Let them sit with you and the baby while you’re putting him to sleep or feeding. The older sibling will feel like they got to feed the baby or that they put the baby to sleep. Let them help with simple chores if they’re small. Tell them that you appreciate all the help and they are such a good older sibling. You can even start a scrapbook that they can help you make. It creates memories and will help them feel closer to the new baby.

Give Them Dolls Or Stuffed Animals To Play With

You can get stuffed animals or baby dolls for the older sibling to ‘take care of’.

They can practice holding and feeding the “baby”.

Having something to take care of will help them understand what mommy has to do when the new baby comes.

Make Sure They Know That They Are Loved

This is probably the most important one. And if you have younger kids this is a big one. Depending on your child’s personality, they will either be happy or sad when a new baby comes. They may take a little longer to warm up to the idea that they aren’t alone anymore – and that’s ok! 

All those fears, outbursts, or just wanting all your time is just their way of letting you know they are still there. Do something special for the older sibling once the baby comes, just so they know you were thinking of them.  It can be a get-together or even something as simple as the two of you baking cookies together.

Even though life can get hectic with multiple kids, always carve out something for just the two of you. It will bring you closer and let the older child know they still have a soft spot in your heart. Having kids is an exciting and terrifying process. There will be ups and downs and some days it will be utter chaos, but you know what? It’s definitely worth it, and you would do it over again 1,000 times.

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